The 130-Storey Treehouse Read online

  ‘If only we were in the treehouse,’ said Terry, ‘we could use the GRABINATOR to save ourselves.’

  ‘But if we were in the treehouse we wouldn’t need to be saved,’ I said.

  ‘Oh yeah,’ said Terry. ‘Good point. Hey, I know! We could use the voice activation option. On the count of three, everybody yell “GRAB”! One, two, three …’

  It worked! One of the GRABINATOR’s long arms extended up out of the tree, pulled us out of the mud and dropped us back into the safety of the treehouse.

  ‘Well, we certainly got all the mud out of the bog toad,’ said Terry. ‘In fact, we got a lot more than I expected!’

  ‘We sure did,’ I said. ‘But where are all the blobs?’

  ‘I don’t know,’ said Jill. ‘It’s so hard to see anything in all this mud.’

  ‘Wait,’ said Terry. ‘I think I can hear them. They’re singing. Listen …’

  We all leaned out of the tree and put our heads close to the mud, and as we listened we heard the song that the blob had sung when it was telling its story.

  ‘It’s the blobs!’ I said. ‘They’re back!’

  ‘Hooray for the blobs!’ said Terry.

  Suddenly, the blobs stopped singing. At first I thought it was because they were shocked to see us sitting there—they’d probably never seen human beings before—but then I noticed a slurping sound. It was getting louder …

  and louder …

  and louder.

  ‘Oh no,’ said Jill. ‘The bog toad is sucking up all the mud again! Watch out, all you blobs!’

  Jill needn’t have worried, though, because the blobs knew exactly what they had to do to save themselves and they wasted no time doing it.

  The bog toad immediately stopped sucking up the mud and began licking its lips in anticipation as it watched them.

  ‘They’re making it a mud pie!’ said Terry.

  ‘Let’s help them!’ said Jill. ‘I love making mud pies!’

  ‘Me too!’ I said.

  I don’t know if you’ve ever made mud pies, but if you haven’t, you should. It’s a lot of fun—messy, but fun!

  When the mud pie was finished we all stood back and admired it.

  We didn’t get to do this for very long, though, because the bog toad immediately started eating it.

  It ate …

  and ate …

  and ate …

  until the mud pie was all gone.

  The bog toad then let out a big burp,

  and hopped away.

  The blobs bounced around excitedly.

  ‘It’s nice to see the blobs so happy,’ I said, ‘but I feel sad that the little blob isn’t here to join in the celebrations.’

  ‘Actually, I am here,’ said a voice behind me. I turned around and saw a blob. But not just any blob. It was our blob!

  ‘You’re alive!’ I said. ‘But how? We buried you in the beautiful sunny meadow. We thought you were dead!’

  ‘Well, I probably was,’ said the blob. ‘Not that I remember much about it. All I know is that I woke up surrounded by mud—beautiful, pure, life-restoring mud! And here I am, feeling better—and blobbier—than ever!’

  The other blobs all crowded around.

  ‘I’m sorry I ate the pie and put you all in danger,’ said the blob. ‘Can you ever forgive me?’

  ‘Of course we can!’ said one of the other blobs. ‘Everyblobby makes mistakes sometimes!’

  It was then that I became aware of an annoying buzzing sound.

  ‘Hey, look,’ said Terry. ‘Another fly! What are the chances?’

  ‘That’s not another fly,’ I said. ‘It’s the exact same one! I’d recognise that annoying buzz anywhere.’

  CHAPTER 12

  RETURN OF THE FLY

  ‘But it can’t be the same fly,’ said Terry. ‘It was eaten by the bog toad—we saw it happen.’

  ‘Actually,’ said Jill, ‘I don’t think we did see it happen. We saw the bog toad try to eat the fly but when it opened its mouth, all the mud came gushing out. Maybe the bog toad didn’t get a chance to swallow the fly.’

  The fly buzzed excitedly as if to confirm what Jill was saying. Or it could have just been buzzing because it was a really annoying fly.

  ‘That’s the sound we heard just before we were released from the belly of the bog toad!’ said one of the blobs. ‘Three cheers for the fly!’

  ‘Hooray! Hooray! Hooray!’ shouted the blobs. ‘Let us sing!’

  ‘Go figure!’ I whispered to Terry and Jill. ‘On Earth that fly was just an annoying pest, but here on Blobdromeda it’s a hero!’

  ‘I’m just glad that the fly—and the blobs—are all okay!’ said Jill.

  ‘Well, I guess we should think about getting back home,’ I said.

  ‘Can’t you stay here with us?’ said the blob. ‘We could spend our days wallowing and singing in the mud together.’

  ‘That sounds like fun,’ I said, ‘but we really have to get home and write our next book. We can’t write it here—the mud would get all over the paper.’

  ‘I understand,’ said the blob. ‘There’s no place like home. But can we ask a favour before you go?’

  ‘Of course,’ I said. ‘What is it?’

  ‘Can your fly stay with us? We would honour it as a hero and it would give us great comfort to know it’s here—just in case any blobs get swallowed by the bog toad in the future.’

  ‘Are you kidding?’ I said. ‘That would be more than okay with me!’

  ‘Andy,’ said Jill, ‘it’s not actually your decision to make. It’s really up to the fly.’

  The blobs turned towards the fly. ‘Will you please stay with us forever and ever and ever?’ they said. ‘Please, please, please?’

  The fly buzzed. It buzzed and buzzed and buzzed and buzzed and buzzed.

  ‘What’s it saying?’ I said.

  ‘Be quiet,’ said Jill. ‘It hasn’t finished buzzing yet!’

  Finally, incredibly, against all odds, the fly was silent.

  ‘Has it finished now?’ I said.

  ‘I think so,’ said Jill.

  ‘What did it say?’

  ‘Well,’ said Jill, taking a deep breath, ‘it said … YES!’

  This triggered another celebration and at least another thousand rounds of ‘Fly, glorious fly’ among the blobs.

  ‘Let’s get going,’ I said to Terry and Jill. ‘Before they realise how annoying that fly is and change their minds about keeping it.’

  ‘Um, there’s just one small problem, though,’ said Terry. ‘Well, when I say “one small problem”, I mean three small problems, and when I say “three small problems”, I mean three big problems: our rocket boosters are all clogged up with mud.’

  ‘Fear not,’ said the blob. ‘We can super-slingshot you at super-speed back to Earth. You’ll be there in no time.’

  ‘Thank you,’ I said. ‘That would be an amazing help.’

  ‘It’s the least we can do after all you’ve done to help us,’ said the blob. ‘Get ready for the ride of your life—and hold on tight!’

  We climbed back up into the tree … and held on tight.

  CHAPTER 13

  THE LAST CHAPTER

  You wouldn’t believe what happened next. I mean, I wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes.

  One group of blobs joined together to form a really big blob with super-strong arms that hugged our tree tight while another group of blobs merged themselves into a giant sling with super-stretchy arms and pulled the tree in the opposite direction.

  ‘Prepare for sling-off,’ called the little blob.

  The sling-blob pulled and pulled until its arms looked like they were going to snap under the strain.

  ‘Three, two, one … SLING!’ shouted the little blob.

  The big blob that had been holding onto our tree let go and, with a deafening TWANG, we were slung away from Blobdromeda at super-slingshot speed!

  ‘Well, that was fun,’ said Terry. ‘Let�
�s go back to the time-wasting level and waste some more time.’

  ‘I think we’ve wasted enough time for one book,’ I said. ‘And, speaking of which, we’ve got a book to write—and a lot to write about. Let’s get started. We should just have enough time to finish it before we get back to Earth.’

  And that’s exactly what we did.

  We wrote …

  and we drew …

  and we drew …

  and we wrote …

  and we wrote …

  and we wrote …

  and we drew …

  and we drew …

  and we wrote and we drew …

  and we drew and we wrote …

  and we drew and we drew …

  and we wrote and we wrote …

  until it was finished and we were almost home!

  We re-entered our solar system, hurtled towards Earth …

  and landed back down in our forest.

  ‘It’s great to be home,’ said Terry. ‘Let’s go for a swim in the see-through swimming pool.’

  ‘Not so fast,’ I said. ‘We still have to get our book to Mr Big Nose. It’s due in FIVE MINUTES!!!’

  ‘Relax, Andy,’ said Terry. ‘We can just walk over to Mr Big Nose’s office and drop it off.’

  ‘I think you’re forgetting that Mr Big Nose’s office is in the city on the other side of the forest,’ I said. ‘Even if we ran the whole way we’d never make it on time.’

  ‘And I think you’re forgetting that we have a super long legs level,’ said Terry. ‘With our super long legs on, Mr Big Nose’s office is just a hop, skip and jump away. Come on!’

  We went to the super long legs level where our legs got longer …

  and longer …

  and longer.

  And then, with a (very long) hop …

  a (very big) skip …

  and a (very high) jump …

  we reached Mr Big Nose’s office and handed our book to him … right on time!

  So, that’s the story of how we got abducted by a giant flying eyeball from outer space, fought in an intergalactic death battle, saved all the blobs on Blobdromeda from the belly of a mud-sucking bog toad and got rid of the most annoying fly on Earth. Thanks for reading, have fun and don’t forget to keep your eyes on the skies, because you never know what—or who—might be out there!

  The 13-Storey Treehouse

  Andy and Terry’s 13-storey treehouse is the most amazing treehouse in the world! It’s got a bowling alley, a see-through swimming pool, a tank full of man-eating sharks, a giant catapult, a secret underground laboratory and a marshmallow machine that follows you around and shoots marshmallows into your mouth whenever you’re hungry.

  Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The 26-Storey Treehouse

  Join Andy and Terry in their newly expanded treehouse, which now features 13 brand-new storeys, including a dodgem car rink, a skate ramp, a mud-fighting arena, an anti-gravity chamber, an ice-cream parlour with 78 flavours run by an ice-cream serving robot called Edward Scooperhands and the Maze of Doom—a maze so complicated that nobody who has gone in has ever come out again … well, not yet, anyway.

  Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The 39-Storey Treehouse

  Join Andy and Terry in their astonishing 39-storey treehouse! Jump on the world’s highest trampoline, toast marshmallows in an active volcano, swim in the chocolate waterfall, pat baby dinosaurs, go head-to-trunk with the Trunkinator, break out your best moves on the dance floor, fly in a jet-propelled swivel chair, ride a terrifying rollercoaster and meet Professor Stupido, the world’s greatest UN-inventor.

  Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The 52-Storey Treehouse

  Andy and Terry’s incredible, ever-expanding treehouse has 13 new storeys, including a watermelon-smashing level, a wave machine, a life-size snakes and ladders game (with real ladders and real snakes!), a rocket-powered carrot-launcher, a Ninja Snail Training Academy and a high-tech detective agency with all the latest high-tech detective technology, which is lucky because they have a BIG mystery to solve—where is Mr Big Nose???

  Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The 65-Storey Treehouse

  Andy and Terry’s amazing 65-storey treehouse now has a pet-grooming salon, a birthday room where it’s always your birthday (even when it’s not), a room full of exploding eyeballs, a lollipop shop, a quicksand pit, an ant farm, a time machine and Tree-NN: a 24-hour-a-day TV news centre keeping you up to date with all the latest treehouse news, current events and gossip.

  Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The 78-Storey Treehouse

  Join Andy and Terry in their spectacular new 78-storey treehouse. They’ve added 13 new levels including a drive-thru car wash, a combining machine, a scribbletorium, an ALL-BALL sports stadium, Andyland, Terrytown, a high-security potato chip storage facility and an open-air movie theatre.

  Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The 91-Storey Treehouse

  Join Andy and Terry in their latest mind-blowing ever-growing treehouse. Go for a spin in the world’s most powerful whirlpool, take a ride in a submarine sandwich, get marooned on a desert island, hang out in a giant spider web, visit the fortune teller’s tent to get your fortune told by Madam Know-it-all and decide whether or not to push the mysterious big red button …

  Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The 104-Storey Treehouse

  Join Andy and Terry in their wonderfully wild and wacky 104-storey treehouse. You can throw some refrigerators, make money with the money-making machine (or honey if you’d prefer—it makes that too), climb the never-ending staircase, have a bunfight, deposit some burps in the burp bank, get totally tangled up in the tangled-up level, or just take some time out and relax in the beautiful sunny meadow full of buttercups, butterflies and bluebirds.

  Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The 117-Storey Treehouse

  Andy and Terry’s amazing treehouse now has 13 new storeys, including a tiny-horse level, a pyjama-party room, an Underpants Museum, a photo-bombing booth, a waiting room, a Door of Doom, a circus, a giant-fighting-robot arena, a traffic school, a water-ski park filled with flesh-eating piranhas and a treehouse visitor centre with a 24-hour information desk, a penguin-powered flying treehouse tour bus and a gift shop.

  Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The Treehouse Fun Books

  Andy, Terry and Jill love having fun in the treehouse. And now it’s your turn! There’s stuff to write, pictures to draw, puzzles to solve and SO MUCH MORE!

  So, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

  The Treehouse Joke Books

  Andy and Terry live in the world’s craziest treehouse. They like making books and telling jokes. And now they’ve made the world’s funniest jokebook!

  From bears to birds, penguins to pirates and skeletons to space, there are gags galore. Perfect for fans of the Treehouse series!

  Q: What’s grey and powdery?

  A: Instant elephant mix.

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  Andy Griffiths lives in a 130-storey treehouse with his friend Terry and together they make funny books, just like the one you’re holding in your hands right now. Andy writes the words and Terry draws the pictures. If you’d like to know more, read this book (or visit www.andygriffiths.com.au).

  Terry Denton lives in a 130-storey treehouse with his friend Andy and together they make funny books, just like the one you’re holding in your hands right now. Terry draws the pictures and Andy writes the words. If you’d like to know more, read this book (or visit www.terrydento
n.com.au).

  ALSO BY ANDY GRIFFITHS

  AND ILLUSTRATED BY TERRY DENTON

  Just Tricking!

  Just Annoying!

  Just Stupid!

  Just Crazy!

  Just Disgusting!

  Just Shocking!

  Just Macbeth!